Lately I have been contemplating the amazing grace of circularity of life’s experiences. The gift that the universe keeps offering over time by showing us different angles of various experiences as it puts us in reverse roles. Maybe this is so we can grow in compassion and understanding for all of the people in our past and forgive them as well as ourselves. Maybe this ever-expanding awareness of everyone’s perspectives serves us by offering permission to handle memories gently and treat ourselves kindly.
I’ve heard Greg Braden talk about the energetic draw towards certain people who come into our lives, seemingly unexpectedly. These people could be thought of as messengers, the universe’s way of sending us someone meant to help us in our healing or inspire our growth at the exact time we need transformation. My interpretation of his talk is that frequently, this energetic connection is sensed as a particularly strong attraction to that person, so it might mean that it could be a potential threat to an existing romantic relationship, depending on what one does with that realization.
Can you detach yourself enough from the immediate rush of emotions to recognize that this person’s job is to bring your awareness to the things that you need to reclaim, and only that? Whether one chooses to reclaim those parts of oneself within the context of the existing relationship or through the new connection is entirely up to that individual and their current circumstance. So this “god-sent” person might very well be the person who is meant to be there for you now, supporting you through the metamorphosis – and your current partner graciously accepts that and lovingly sets you free – or it can be someone who, through their energetic presence, strengthens your current relationship by shedding light on areas in need of attention.
This is where equanimity (accepting) and settling come into play. One is not the same as the other. Accepting holds a sense of gratitude and leaves room for inspiration and motivation to move forward with purpose and intention. Settling evokes a sense of resignation, and ultimately sadness, if not resentment, extinguishing the spark to move forward with joy. So, if you choose to stay in the relationship, are you accepting that there is work to be done and are motivated to do it, confidently approaching the challenges, or are you settling, setting yourself up for a life of quiet resignation?
Have you had experiences in life where you were unsure how to proceed, tossed between the head and the heart, conflicted in both, and have made a decision you came to regret immediately after? Maybe the regret came later, in hindsight, and you have been able to forgive yourself because you knew that in the moment you did the best you could with the awareness you had at the time. How have decisions you had made in the past affected your life going forward? What have those experiences taught you, or imprinted on you on a subconscious level that only later became evident through patterns of thought and behavior? Without assigning value to any of it, can you identify the universe’s teachings as they played out in your life?
When you find your head and your heart playing tug-of-war, and you can’t find peace in any scenarios that run through your mind, ask yourself these questions:
Is the person you are with a beautiful person?
Do they inspire you to be a beautiful person?
Do you love them beyond simply caring about their well-being?
If you love them, do you love them gently, or do you love them fiercely?
Do you love them cautiously, or do you love them courageously?
Is that the way they want to be loved?
Is that the way you want to be loving them?
Are you smitten by someone new?
If so, can you recognize the things you’re being invited to reclaim in yourself and/or your relationship by the virtue of the new connection appearing in your life?
If you stay in your current relationship, are you accepting the person and the relationship with all the shortcomings, motivated and inspired to move forward with purpose and intention?
Or are you settling?
If you are settling, are you prepared to consciously and continuously work on the spark to keep you moving through life joyfully?
If you let go, can you understand that you’ve been given a chance to grow in awareness, compassion and love, and that if you pursue the new relationship it might quickly feel like this one is ‘forever”?
But can you recognize that, like anything in life, things are only forever, for now?
Love is an experience of eternity if you accept that in its boundlessness it is an eternal shape shifter.
Recent Comments